IHOP Girl: My Future

Monday, November 06, 2006

My Future

That sounds like such a large monumental concept does it not? "THE FUTURE". After all, think about your future; the hopes, dreams, and possibilities that at times seem so unclear, and at other times seem to lead us in a straight line. I know that this sounds appears to be quiet theoretical, but as I am gaining more life experience I am beginning to understand the absolute trust we must have in the Lord. Little 'ol me has all these plans, where, when, and how my life is going to work...when in reality I cannot make one thing happen on my own, without the Lord. This leads me to think how ironic it is that for all the plans I make and could never put into action; I get so offended at the Lord when he changes those plans. I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with plans, goals, and great ideas; instead I think that for me I just need the reminder to always trust that the Lord knows those good plans that He has for me, and if I follow Him, and keep a heart tender to His leading I will live in a way that pleases the Lord, and ultimately will satisfy my heart.

Ahh, I love a good contemplative moment...:-)...As for life, I am actually in the midst of deciding where I might go upon graduation. I tell ya' there are so many choices! My friends at school are determined to keep me here, my family and friends at home (ie. Jess #1, parental guidences, and Heather) will kill me if I don't move back home ;-), and I have job offers and opportunities from across the country. I hate choices...lol...Well, this is true, whatever decision I make doesn't have to be perminant, and will only open other doors for me. Anyway, I got to go to a very fun conference on Saturday, and see my MUMMY!!!!!! Yeah!!!!! We had a blast, and got to listen to hours of info relating to nursing and jobs, etc. I find it quite entertaining to see a couple hundred nurses and nursing students interacting. I think that my favorite part of the conference was when this one nurse was answering a question about why there is not some way to make IV ports unique to the tubing so that nurses can't make mistakes and put something like Ensure into an IV line instead of a gastric tube where it should be...because this has happened. The nurse replied with, "actually the two different tubes don't fit on the IV port...however nurses are known for their creativity and if something doesn't work they WILL find a way." Nurses are so use to having to work with things that don't work, having to be creative, and having to think out side the box, that sometimes its to our death...er...to the death of whoever we put Ensure in their veins...cough! Anyway, it was funny to think of how creativity can sometimes be a negative, and the nurse reminded us, "if something doesn't work or fit right, before you MAKE it work you should first check to make sure that it SHOULD work". Ah, such a simple idea, and yet at times how we forget...lol.

Well, I apologize for the delay of a recent posting, and for the length of this one. Enjoy, and comment well! :-)

2 comments:

Lauralou said...: I sense a joke about Ensure coming... Am I right? (PS you COULD move home, couldn't you, Claire!); 2:38 PM
Jess said...: Hello my dear Clair!! It was lovely to talk to you the other day (for almost 45 minutes by the way!) and I have missed you so much. I know I don't always show it very well (i.e., rare phone calls, no cards) but it is TRUE!

However...that is not to say that you should not pursue your dreams and the Lord's plans for you. I would miss you terribly and life would never be the same again without you around to laugh, to cheer me up, to make me realise just how small my problems are and how huge and all-encompassing my blessings are. You bring the love and the light of Christ into my life and into the lives of all the other people you've ever met.

*starts singing* "You are my sunshine..." *ahem*

BUT, it is precisely because you are such a joy that I know the world needs you. It would be very selfish of me to claim you exclusively, but then I've always been selfish with my friends...probably because I rarely ever had any around! LOL!

All that to say, you go ahead and do it. Do anything and everything the Lord leads you to do (and that you think would be fun!). Keep on doing what I've never been able to do -- cast off anything holding you back and fly free!

(I know I'm overreacting, but my life seems to be coming apart at the seams in so many areas right now, so please excuse my tendency toward the hysterical. LOL!)

In any event, know that whatever you decide, I will always love and support you, and if you ever -- anytime, anywhere -- need anything (hugs, food, conversation, place to stay, chocolate, a good book, or what have you)...I am here. You are one of the most special people in my life, and don't you ever forget it, because I know I won't.

Go for it! Whatever it is, you can find it on eBay...no, no, no, I meant, whatever it is, you can do it! :D :D :D

Love always,
"Mary"; 2:59 PM

Movie Night In...I love a good movie!

Mega Mind
Taking Chance (Will make you cry like a baby)
Charlotte Grey (A bit of a different take on Nazi Germany)
Series - Merlin (I LOVE BBC)
Robin Hood (Okay, a love Russell Crowe, you'll have to understand that about me...)
Kingdom of Heaven (Chuck full of acting power with an epic tale)
Miss Potter (Such a great film! Story of the creator of Peter Rabbit)
How to Train your Dragon (Possibly my favorite animated movie ever...I'm like a little kid, I watch it over and over)
Buck (Sundance winner, Biography of Horse Trainer, heart touching)
Lost in Austin (Modern day spin on Pride and Prej.)

Life as a nurse...

Great words by Reb Jeff: Vayishlach: Facing Death

"Rachel died. She was buried on the road to Ephrat — now called Bethlehem. Jacob set up a pillar above her grave. It is the pillar at Rachel’s grave to this day."–Genesis 35:19-20

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vidui http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shiva_(Judaism), and preparing the notifications to the community, feel like little fragments of the sacred. I have been entrusted with the care and tending of the most powerful, complex and difficult emotions that a person can experience in life. I have been made, in some small part, a guardian of the memory of a departed soul — a life that touches upon many other lives.After dropping off my older daughter at her high school this morning, I made a stop at Treasure Coast Hospice http://www.tchospice.org/, a remarkable organization that sets a very high standard for the loving and respectful care of the dying. There, I visited a lovely man whom I have seen a few times in his hospice room. I sat by his bedside and listened to him (in full possession of his faculties) as he told me about his worries about his family, the support of his wife after he is gone, and the future of his children and grandchildren. I was deeply moved by the way he put any concern for himself — even while facing death — in a distant backseat to his concerns for his family. When my own time comes, I can only hope to have his awareness of the way that one life can touch so many others.Also at hospice, I visited a woman I have known for the past two years — a dear soul who is a former Jewish religious school director. I sat with her, too, singing psalms to her as I listened to her heavy and labored breathing. I have no medical training, but I have come to know the sound of a person who is close to death. The body begins to fight for each breath as it slowly looses it grasp on life. As I held her hand and sang, I realized that being a rabbi is no protection against becoming one of the people caught in the web of connection. I, too, am changed by the loss of a life that has touched mine.Later in the day, I met with a couple from our congregation. She had just learned that her brother died yesterday in a car crash. Coming to terms with the loss is made more difficult for her by the fact that she and her brother had not seen each other or spoken in five years. Sometimes, people think it is easier to mourn the death of someone who has moved out of your life. In my experience, though, it's harder. Grief is magnified by wounded love and regret. I have no magic words to say to ease the pain of mourning. All I can do is listen, become a vessel in which people place their stories, and offer compassion.Actually, there is one more thing I can do. I can have faith that "all I can do" is all that I need to do. It is enough.In this week's Torah portion (Vayishlach) Jacob watched Rachel, the love of his life, die in childbirth. He was overcome by grief. Jacob had worked for his cruel uncle Laban for fourteen years to earn the right to marry Rachel. Now she was gone. Because she died while they were traveling, Jacob had to bury her by the side of the road. He built a pillar of stones on the spot to mark the place as sacred.This is what we all do, in one way or another, when death enters our lives. We grieve and our hearts break. We wish that we could continue to walk along the path of life with our loved ones forever, but the dead cannot fully join us. We have to leave something behind in order to resume our own journey. So, what do we do? We mark the moment as sacred. We erect monuments — both in cemeteries and in our hearts. The stones we place on top of stones remind us that a life may end, but its sanctity is forever.The Torah says that the monument Jacob built for his beloved continues to stand until this day. A life that touches the lives of others never ceases to send living reverberations throughout the web that binds us all.