IHOP Girl: What Are Men Good For Again?

Friday, July 28, 2006

What Are Men Good For Again?

Ok, strange, but perhapes appropriate title...I'll let you make your own judgement call on that one after you hear my story.

Here goes...I was at work, and I was sitting reading the a little medical history, when I stumbled upon some questions that the Doctor had asked the family. Interested I read on;

Category: "Physical signs and symptoms"
Doctor's Note: " Family states that patient is able to dig holes, mow the lawn, and carry out other household chores."

Ok, I might not be the brightest crayon in the box, but how often do you have to dig holes as part of your daily chores? Unless of course you are a ditch digger...this however is not the case...Needless to say I was sitting there cracking up at the fact that neither laundry, taking out the trash, or any other number of normal chores were mentioned. No, instead ditch digging was the first item on the list. Hahaha...Sorry, ok, I'm done.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.................

8 comments:

Jess said...: HA HA!!! That is AWESOME! Not awesome in and of itself, but awesome as something to laugh at. Oh, I would have been laughing so hard, right along with you. I love the title of your post. I agree completely. LOL!! Sometimes it seems as if all they are good for is dust-bunny habitat. You know, kind of like how a coral reef grows? New little tiny sea creatures growing on top of what has already died? When you see telltale specks in the guy's hair, it's not time to buy him dandruff shampoo -- it's time to pry him out of the couch and DUST HIM OFF! LOL!! OK, that's a little harsh. I'm being unfair. Not all men are like that. But the one whose medical history you were reading certainly qualifies, yes? LOL!!; 1:32 PM
Clair Bannerman (alias) said...: LOL...I love you, you are hillarious!; 7:00 PM
Jess said...: No, you are! xD

Love you too, by the way!

See you soon!

:D; 9:07 PM
Jess said...: #1: I agree. But females can do that, too.

#2: beeping?

#3: unfortunately, yes.

#4: see #1.

#5: most definitely. I would venture to say that this is your strongest category and probably the one that comes the easiest to you.

#6: what are you talking about?!

#7: not gonna touch that one.

#8: see #7.

#9: you, sir, have never written one blog posting in your entire life. You have commented, but you have not posted. Therefore I must disagree with this premise.

One last thing: "preemiently"? Why are you talking about prematurely born children? Or did you mean "preeminently"?

I love being an editor. It's so much fun to annoy other people. I do believe it's what I do best.

:) :) :); 1:22 PM
data-mite said...: sfl's comments are wry and insightful - as always...

However, author fails to note that "Family" was the one who stated hole digging as first item in the list. Since "Family" was most likely "wife" - a more interesting analysis would have been along the lines of "What the heck was she thinking???".

FWIW; 1:40 PM
Clair Bannerman (alias) said...: I think you've met your intelectual match SFL....lol...; 4:31 AM
Clair Bannerman (alias) said...: Oh, and by the way Data - you are quite correct...I have no clue what she was thinking....; 4:33 AM
data-mite said...: Certainly, the identity of the data-mite is not inscrutable…
& BTW, ‘author’ refers to Clair Bannerman herself, not sfl.; 11:17 AM

Movie Night In...I love a good movie!

Mega Mind
Taking Chance (Will make you cry like a baby)
Charlotte Grey (A bit of a different take on Nazi Germany)
Series - Merlin (I LOVE BBC)
Robin Hood (Okay, a love Russell Crowe, you'll have to understand that about me...)
Kingdom of Heaven (Chuck full of acting power with an epic tale)
Miss Potter (Such a great film! Story of the creator of Peter Rabbit)
How to Train your Dragon (Possibly my favorite animated movie ever...I'm like a little kid, I watch it over and over)
Buck (Sundance winner, Biography of Horse Trainer, heart touching)
Lost in Austin (Modern day spin on Pride and Prej.)

Life as a nurse...

Great words by Reb Jeff: Vayishlach: Facing Death

"Rachel died. She was buried on the road to Ephrat — now called Bethlehem. Jacob set up a pillar above her grave. It is the pillar at Rachel’s grave to this day."–Genesis 35:19-20

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vidui http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shiva_(Judaism), and preparing the notifications to the community, feel like little fragments of the sacred. I have been entrusted with the care and tending of the most powerful, complex and difficult emotions that a person can experience in life. I have been made, in some small part, a guardian of the memory of a departed soul — a life that touches upon many other lives.After dropping off my older daughter at her high school this morning, I made a stop at Treasure Coast Hospice http://www.tchospice.org/, a remarkable organization that sets a very high standard for the loving and respectful care of the dying. There, I visited a lovely man whom I have seen a few times in his hospice room. I sat by his bedside and listened to him (in full possession of his faculties) as he told me about his worries about his family, the support of his wife after he is gone, and the future of his children and grandchildren. I was deeply moved by the way he put any concern for himself — even while facing death — in a distant backseat to his concerns for his family. When my own time comes, I can only hope to have his awareness of the way that one life can touch so many others.Also at hospice, I visited a woman I have known for the past two years — a dear soul who is a former Jewish religious school director. I sat with her, too, singing psalms to her as I listened to her heavy and labored breathing. I have no medical training, but I have come to know the sound of a person who is close to death. The body begins to fight for each breath as it slowly looses it grasp on life. As I held her hand and sang, I realized that being a rabbi is no protection against becoming one of the people caught in the web of connection. I, too, am changed by the loss of a life that has touched mine.Later in the day, I met with a couple from our congregation. She had just learned that her brother died yesterday in a car crash. Coming to terms with the loss is made more difficult for her by the fact that she and her brother had not seen each other or spoken in five years. Sometimes, people think it is easier to mourn the death of someone who has moved out of your life. In my experience, though, it's harder. Grief is magnified by wounded love and regret. I have no magic words to say to ease the pain of mourning. All I can do is listen, become a vessel in which people place their stories, and offer compassion.Actually, there is one more thing I can do. I can have faith that "all I can do" is all that I need to do. It is enough.In this week's Torah portion (Vayishlach) Jacob watched Rachel, the love of his life, die in childbirth. He was overcome by grief. Jacob had worked for his cruel uncle Laban for fourteen years to earn the right to marry Rachel. Now she was gone. Because she died while they were traveling, Jacob had to bury her by the side of the road. He built a pillar of stones on the spot to mark the place as sacred.This is what we all do, in one way or another, when death enters our lives. We grieve and our hearts break. We wish that we could continue to walk along the path of life with our loved ones forever, but the dead cannot fully join us. We have to leave something behind in order to resume our own journey. So, what do we do? We mark the moment as sacred. We erect monuments — both in cemeteries and in our hearts. The stones we place on top of stones remind us that a life may end, but its sanctity is forever.The Torah says that the monument Jacob built for his beloved continues to stand until this day. A life that touches the lives of others never ceases to send living reverberations throughout the web that binds us all.